DOSE:

0.35 g

smoked

Cannabis

(plant material)

BODY WEIGHT:

165 lb

This experience was definitely one of the funniest, if not the most memorable one. I’ll try to put every detail as I remember it here, because everything’s a little fuzzy. Oh well.
Here we go...

---------------

I’m a good student, make good grades, have never had any trouble with law enforcement (They’re on my mind a lot now) and am just overall chilling through life. I got into weed late November of senior year and I loved it. I had seen colors and heard music in ways I never thought I could. So here I was, in June, a kid trying to smoke, but I needed friends to do it with. I overheard my friend J (we’ll refer to people as initials) talking about how he can smoke every morning in his garage since his parents don’t get home until the late afternoon. The chance to smoke with him, every day, and doing crazy stuff attracted me, so I asked him if I could.

“Sure dude.”

I texted him and asked if I could show up as early as 8 and he said that was perfect, so I made plans for that time. Even though it was summer, I didn’t care about waking up early if it meant that I could chill with him. The next morning I gathered my supply box, which consisted of a lighter and some bud copped from the local premium dealer. I drove over and parked my car on the other side of the road near J’s house, so if I had to run, I could make a smooth transition to driving.

As soon as I walked up to the door, his dog started barking ferociously, I mean it was loud and definitely scared me. J’s brother P held back his dog and told me,
“Sorry dude, he doesn’t like black people.”

Oh.

We made our way to the garage where I saw J was preparing the gravity bongs for us, with a socket that he had saved in his room from some old toolbox or something. He set it up and then I took out my bud. I never charge my friends and I love smoking fellow bros up. He lit it and we took big hits off of it; I would say about 4 or 5 I had. We only used about .3 of weed, so it wasn’t that bad.

A little less than 10 seconds after I inhaled, I tried to stand up and I felt like I was one of those York Peppermint Patty commercials, where the guy’s on the mountain and screaming. I was then thrown into a trance where I gathered around the water bottle on the ground and began making shouting noises at it, while dancing like a tribal warrior. I saw J step back but at that time I thought it was just because he was scared of fire.

What the...

It was then in one fluid motion that I saw J and P get up and take towels to wipe off the water from the bong, then change clothes and spray the garage. They were so much more experienced than I was, I thought. This was amazing to me. They had such an organized and efficient method to hiding the evidence from their parents, and I was just sitting there, not contributing. It was almost like they were robots being controlled by some kind of remote, because their movements were so in tune with what they were doing. I saw very mild trails of their arms and I realized that I probably looked like a freak for staring at their arms for so long, but I didn’t care. It was beautiful.

As we made our way into the kitchen for snacks, almost immediately, it turned into a cooking show set, where everything looked so perfect and in place. I just stopped and stared, like I was nervous to be going onto a professional’s set. J was the host of the show and he was showing me around with the spices and the drinks. Funny. He then ran onto his couch and put on the Fresh Prince, a show that is highly recommended for anyone that’s new to smoking. We all sat down with cereal and as we were watching, an event occurred that I will never forget.

From the corner of my eye, I noticed a black and yellow figure by the window. I turned my head to the tv, but then I looked again.

That’s what I saw...

“Holy shit, dude! It’s the cops!! I aggressively whispered.

I then made my way upstairs, kind of like power walking and I ducked under the railings of the stairs because I thought I could pretend to be asleep, then wake up. I saw the figure’s head moving from side to side and I for sure thought that the house was about to be broken into and swarmed by SWAT officers. Dozens of thoughts went through my head:

“I can’t have a criminal record, now, anytime but now!”

“Why is this happening to me? I’m a good kid!”

“They said they were experts… how did the cops find us??”

I thought it was over. I thought my time of smoking had come to an end. I thought I was going to be booked and my parents would bail me out, and then leave me on the street. I’d be kicked out for sure. Why did I choose this life? Is this what smokers have to deal with every day?

I peeked downstairs to see if P and J had started running, but they hadn’t even moved. They looked at me with some kind of perplexed look and I slowly made my way downstairs. I tiptoed to the door and realized that the only things in the window were balloons. Black and yellow fucking balloons. I ran upstairs and freaked out and contemplated the rest of my life over balloons.

...Dude, you are such a fucking idiot.

Then we heard a noise, a phone ringing. It was J’s dad!

J picked up and answered his phone. I whispered to P, “How does he talk to his dad like that?”

I was terrible talking to my dad baked, and I had no idea how he did it.
It turns out that he got off work early so he was on his way home. We decided not to stay and headed over to the neighborhood pool. I laid back on the pool chair, and was about to put my headphones in when I saw a cleaning salesman go from house to house.

For some reason I got really pissed at him, not because he was selling shitty cleaning supplies but because of something else. He was walking across the peoples’ grasses and going to their doors. I mean, he didn’t have any respect for them, well enough, for that matter, to use the driveway.

I thought he was pathetic and I hated his face. Kind of a drastic thought, but it just popped in my head.

The rest of the day I just drifted away into a sea of sounds by Chance the Rapper’s Acid Rap and some Morcheeba. I couldn’t feel anything in my body and was entranced by the synths and vocals. Pretty good.

Overall, now that I think about it, it was one of my funniest experiences. I told P and J about it and they laughed, probably thinking I made everything up. Haha... ha.. yeah.

Exp Year: 2014	ExpID: 103824
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: Jul 10, 2014	Views: 2,863
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Cannabis (1) : General (1), Small Group (2-9) (17)