DOSE:

10 mg

oral

DOM

BODY WEIGHT:

170 lb

The Glory and the Terror

I have never wanted to write an experience report. I have gone to the desert and back on many substances, and I would say that my strongest psychedelic experience before DOM was 25 hits of acid or ~70mg of 2C-B insufflated. This is a different ballgame.

I took 10mg orally at a small festival in Northern California with 1100 of my closest friends. I knew that I was going after a leviathan and I wanted to be around all of the people who love me in case I had a psychotic break. Please also note that I have never had any psychotic issues on any substance ever.

T+:00 - no noticeable effects.

T-1:00 - I am beginning to feel a small amount of trepidation, a bit like my first acid trip.

T+2:00 - it feels like a primal force is building inside of me. It was at this moment that I knew I was in for an experience. Do you know what it's like right before that 110 mph storm in the desert? That eerie sense of calm? I begin to feel a sensation of fingers drumming on my spine.

T+3:00 - oh my god, what have I done. It feels like a thousand rhinos crashing headfirst into one another at my feet. The visuals are far harder than the hardest acid visuals I've ever had and the journey hasn't even begun. It is like a roar that grows louder every second. I have never done anything as loud as this drug.

T+4-6:00 - at first it seems like all I have to worry about is things looking pretty and a bit of warmness in my chest. As the trip goes on, I start to feel emotions, like a beam of light into my chest. It's so fascinating, like every emotion being poured into me like a faucet. Fear, love, happiness, anger, sadness, and, most interesting, bone-chilling terror. I have never feared anything in my life and I don't believe I actually feared the sensations of this chemical, but I did shake for the rest of the trip, every now and again, like what I imagine one might feel when being hunted. The DOM roars louder with each passing second. I can feel every cell in my brain firing as hard as any trip I've ever experienced, like the frying on acid but much harder. The trees in the woods begin to breathe. As I try to dance on the dance floor at this campout full of friends, I am acutely aware that I am the loudest thing in the room, as if I were the sun and all of the hippies on acid were lesser stars a thousand miles away. I burn so hot. Every person who tries to talk to me is overwhelmed by the intensity of my gaze such that I try not to make eye contact while describing the effects of this chemical.

T+7-14:00 - I have never experienced a drug that gets louder for 14 hours. It is surreal. I went to the bathroom in my room to get some water and the droplets along the sink seem to be pulled upwards by a million tiny claws. I feel all of the emotions, like standing on the edge of awe while simultaneously being hunted by a pack of hyenas. I vomit and I am certain that my girlfriend is outside of the room slitting her wrists open and carving her heart out of her chest like an Aztec sacrifice. I call her name as loud as I can but she doesn't hear me. I step through the door after I regain a small amount of composure and there she is in the next room totally fine, totally human. I had no idea psychedelics could do that to you (this realization made me very happy as it was yet another confirmation that hallucinations are not real). I could feel a thousand eyes bearing down on me, and I loved it. That feeling of fear is something I will savor forever.

I began to fall in and out of love with my girlfriend a thousand times a second. It is so bizarre to measure romances in hertz. I can't even imagine how it must've felt for her at the time (note: when talking about it later she described this as a surreal experience for her as normally I am the mentally strongest person she's ever met and at that moment I was so very weak. She found such an incredible change in my demeanor to be unnerving. In retrospect, I could've tried to warn her more beforehand, but realistically I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Again, orders of magnitude stronger than 25 hits of acid). We go for a walk in the woods and I am certain that another person would've lost their mind in that darkness. Every line, every shadow, looked like a monster reaching forth to consume me. I think the world could smell my fear, but I was laughing at how ludicrous that thought could be while simultaneously shaking in terror. It was so cool. The visuals and the emotions begin to let up at hour 14.

T+14-20:00 - I have made it through the woods of this trip relatively unscathed. Now the emotions are tolerable, like seeing a beautiful painting and a rattlesnake at the same time instead of standing on the edge of a canyon while being hunted. The peak of this trip was like experiencing the totality of glory and terror at the same time. I spend most of these quieter hours describing the experience to a number of my friends, some of whom remark their experiences on lower doses of other methylated 2c variants. I try to sleep but I shake every so often, enough that I feel like I'm bothering my girlfriend so I get back out of bed and walk around. I begin to disassemble the artworks I brought to this event while still hallucinating as hard as any acid trip I've ever been on. At hour 20 the visuals begin to subside. The roar is like a dull moan now.

T+21-25:00 - the effects of the drug are nearly gone now. It feels like the waning hours of a very calm acid trip now. I made the mistake of taking it after having been up nearly 24 hours already, and I still don't feel tired. I ended up falling asleep at about T+30:00, and I slept without dreams.

Overall, I would describe this drug as the closest thing that I've had to a primary religious experience. I would not recommend this chemical to anyone who had not taken acid at least 100 times, and I would not recommend it to anyone who was well-acquainted with fear. It is the first sinister psychedelic I have ever taken, and I will never forget it. To be able to touch bone-chilling terror is such an incredibly special experience for me, one that provided a stark relief against which to view my life. I had so many revelations, so many lessons learned. I realized that all I fear in life is losing the people I love, and that I have so much work to do in this land. I want to build so many things and I am excited to be more thoughtful in my choices in this life.

This drug is a special thing and should not be taken lightly. I saw myself in ways I hadn't before. After this experience, I felt like I had slain a dragon.

Exp Year: 2017	ExpID: 110726
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 29
Published: Oct 19, 2019	Views: 5,386
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DOM (20), Sleep Deprivation (140) : Mystical Experiences (9), General (1), Festival / Lg. Crowd (24)