A Communion
Mushrooms - P. cubensis
Citation: JS. "A Communion: An Experience with Mushrooms - P. cubensis (exp115673)". Erowid.org. Apr 12, 2023. erowid.org/exp/115673
DOSE: |
5 g | oral | Mushrooms - P. cubensis | (dried) |
BODY WEIGHT: | 145 lb |
At first it was a recognizable feeling of almost a buzzed drunk off of the shrooms and the trip was still very physical in nature. It slowly began to get stronger and my visual field began to shift. I was in the dark in the backyard of an old farm house around a campfire and I had this sensation of eyes staring at me from the bushes. Not threatening eyes, but eyes that wouldn't stop watching me. I brushed it off and talked with everyone around the fire. To my left there was a long stretch of yard, maybe 100 yards / 91.44 meters. In an instant I saw that 100 yards snap right next to my cheek and I saw it at first out of the side of my eye. When I turned to it and it stayed there I remember thinking, "You are high dude." it eventually moved back and I continued tripping.
The visuals kept getting stronger and they eventually formed into what I can only describe as a universe sized net of energy which I could feel and perceived as an undulating chain of transparent forms of human bodies. The bodies were all connected at the neck and their heads were not visible. It was a rapid movement but it filled all space and my own physical form seemed made of these tubes. I have since named this imagery, "people tubes." I have never experienced it since.
Eventually I was hit with an extreme wave of euphoria and I had the sensation of approaching a full body orgasm. This scared me because as I approached this extreme peak of positive emotion I saw the other side of the circle so all of these negative emotions. I saw the balance of things in that instant and it freaked me out. I was a stoner kid at that point and I was shown the most profound statement of my life, and I was terrified. I was able to steer myself away from completely falling into a terrifying feeling only for a few moments.
I first collapsed into the lawn chair behind me, then from the chair onto the ground, which was moving like a stream underneath me and seemed to be bottomless in its depth. It was like a jungle floor with large roots and leaves crisscrossing and curling around underneath me. My friend asked if I needed my brother, who had just told us he was going to bed. I said, "yes" and he ran to get him. I immediately laid on my back and put my head flat on the ground, maybe 2 feet from the fire. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath and felt each of my lungs fill one half of the earth underneath me. I blew that breath out and my awareness followed it. I was blasted through the layer of people tubes and into what is wonderfully depicted in Alex Grey's, Net of Being. Interlocking heads which had no human gender traits were following the gaze of my awareness as I passed through this space. I felt as if these heads were my awareness looking back at my awareness. I eventually teleported to a space that was void yet full of life and a shimmer. It was familiar and I had a very convincing feeling of being home and that I had never left that space nor would I ever leave that space. It felt like a communion with god
I eventually teleported to a space that was void yet full of life and a shimmer. It was familiar and I had a very convincing feeling of being home and that I had never left that space nor would I ever leave that space. It felt like a communion with god
Eventually I snapped back into my body, pushing my fist to the ground and saying out loud, "I'm not gonna die today." I really thought I was seeing an after-death or a during-death state. I stood up and took a short walk to the house and met my brother and my friend there. It seemed like what I had experienced went on forever but it was more like one minute. The rest of the night I was afraid to fall asleep because it was so close to death and I was traumatized while also recognizing the sheer beauty and profundity of what I had just went through. I eventually decided to stay in the living room where my aunt was sleeping to Tales from the Darkside. I felt comfortable enough to stay there while making frequent trips to the bathroom to check to see if I was still alive or in the same world. I woke up the next day feeling like a different person. I was shocked at what had happened to me.
After returning home from the trip, it hit me that I had no idea how to live my life knowing what I had just went through. I fell into a very bad mental space for over two years after this trip. I was delusional and actually felt as though I was alone in my mind and I was making up the world around me. It was always on my mind and I could never stop thinking about the trip. Now almost 6 years later (this November 2021), I can look back on a naive teenager with very little drug experience who had no idea what 5 dried grams was capable of. After all of the torture this trip put me through I can confidently say that it was the most profound and unexpected experiences of my life and I will never forget it.
Take it easy.
But take it.
-Jake
Exp Year: 2015 | ExpID: 115673 |
Gender: Male | |
Age at time of experience: 17 | |
Published: Apr 12, 2023 | Views: 751 |
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Mushrooms - P. cubensis (66) : General (1), Difficult Experiences (5), Mystical Experiences (9), Entities / Beings (37), Post Trip Problems (8), Small Group (2-9) (17) |
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