DOSE:		smoked	Toad Venom	(dried)
		smoked	Toad Venom	(extract)

BODY WEIGHT:

120 lb

Here is an attempt to give as best of an account as I can from my recent meeting with Bufo (5-me0-DMT from Bufo Toad). Although words could never explain the most important aspects of the journey. Here is the best I can do:

I was chosen to go first out of 12 people. I sat down and was instructed to begin my breath work as the facilitator started to heat up the medicine. One last deep breath in and out, then I inhaled until I felt I no longer could and held it in as long as possible. I’m unsure of the dosage.

I was helped into a laying position and what came next is hard to explain and very hard for me to believe still. I was asked prior if I wanted it to be filmed with my phone, and was told it would be hard for me to believe.

I immediately began to move in very bizarre (to me) ways. Bicycling my legs in a rapid motion, making mudras, arms waving and spinning in symmetrical motions. I began to lift up my shirt and tap on my stomach, as well as making these waving and spinning motions with my hands. I then made hand motions like I was opening my abdomen, and tapped up my stomach to my heart. I was being healed as well as being shown how to heal myself. My hands would shoot out to my side from time to time and violently shake with energy. The only way I can describe it is that I felt like I was some sort of device hooked up directly to the power of God and it was so overwhelming. At one point my arms would writhe out to my side like snakes, and I would feel peoples energetic barriers. Every time it felt like too much I just repeated “let go, let go” and I would go deeper and deeper. At one point I heard the lady who had just began to trip behind me crying. I was unaware until later who it was or that she was on her journey at the same time. All I remember is that her crying sounded equally beautiful as people laughing. EVERYTHING was perfect and beautiful.

At one point the facilitator was hugging me. I opened my eyes and saw him, but he was me. He looked no different than normal, but he WAS me. And I was me. And everyone in the room was me. I felt the entire power of the Universe coursing through our arms. I then grabbed him as hard as I could. It felt like two mountains being crushed together (in the best way) and I heard him say “EASY brother.” It looked and felt like hugging myself through someone else’s body, only reflected within a hundred mirrors. I let him go and asked if he could hug me again, he said he could not as he needed to attend to someone else. Another guy from the group appeared before me. He was someone who the night before, I had decided his appearance bugged me for whatever reason. I liked him, just not his outward appearance. He gave me another Universe hug and I saw myself in his face. Again he looked no different, although he WAS me. Me hugging me. And we were perfect.

I laid back down and could never in a million years describe what I felt/saw next. I felt like I was in direct contact with the non-duality of God. That statement pales in comparison to my experience. I was told that the Universe wants me to forget, for Us to forget. So that it can keep the game of life going. The Unending Cycle. I was told I would forget. I learned later that I said this all out loud, but in the moment it felt like downloads into my brain. I was also told that I am too wrapped up into finding “meaning” in things, and that Everything just IS. Again, this part of the trip is absolutely unexplainable.

After an unknown amount of time I was asked if I was ready to move into a seated position so that another person could begin. The facilitator said it would be a perfect time for me to help the next person start their trip. I was still incredibly high and tripping balls but I immediately rolled onto my side and positioned myself and the next person's feet in a kneeling position. I have no conscious thoughts about doing so. I felt animated by the Spirit.

The person going next was in my eyes not exactly an attractive man outwardly. But in this moment I saw him as an absolute perfect representation of a human. I felt like Christ at the disciple's feet. I placed my medicine bag I had been holding at his feet and just knelt in veneration as I watched him begin.

At some point I sat back and continued to make these “strange” patterns and movements with my hands. Sometimes looking like mudras, sometimes praying, clapping, tapping my fingers, making waves. I felt like I was conducting energy. It was all very much out of my control. It was so bizarre to me and my ego was starting to reassert itself into my physical form. I felt for a moment like everyone in the room would judge me or think I was crazy. But I was so high and I couldn’t stop if I had wanted to. I watched a few more people go through their trips. Each looked like a perfect incarnation of God no matter what their physical form looked like. At one point a lady who was there to play crystal bowls for us walked by me and felt like a Spirit or ghost. She then said to me “you need to follow your gift.” It really was hard for me to hear since the hand movements were so strange at the time. I finally started to come down and it was suggested I go out in the sun, which I did.

I came back inside and watched the second half of the people go. Watching others was almost as powerful as doing it myself. I watched people go through what looked and sounded like exorcisms. Screaming, crying, yelling, angry, shaking, spitting up and frothing at the mouth. It was all so intense and so intimate I’m forever grateful to have been able to witness Others.

Again these words fall short. Very very short. It was terrifyingly beautiful and the most powerful thing I’ve ever experienced in my life short of watching my daughter being born in our own home.

It’s only two days after and I’m working on learning to once again be in my body. I in no way feel like the person I was before. I see the signs that he was there, but he is not. My one “request” to the medicine was that it would heal me in any way it saw fit. I had physical ailments disappear, I feel like I can breathe for the first time since I was a child. I feel like I can once again enjoy life in all its facets. I had lost the lust for life prior. I feel like a huge stone has been lifted from my chest. I’m forever grateful for my experience and only wish I could better articulate it. You are Me, I am You, We are IT. And at the same time we are separate and unique. It’s a paradox that I do not think we can understand, and I do not think we’re supposed to.
Endless Love to you all.

Exp Year: 2022	ExpID: 116843
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 38
Published: Dec 21, 2022	Views: 341
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Toad Venom (46) : General (1), Large Group (10+) (19)