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What the Hell Am I Doing?
Datura
Citation:   Poisoned. "What the Hell Am I Doing?: An Experience with Datura (exp25679)". Erowid.org. Jul 30, 2003. erowid.org/exp/25679

 
DOSE:
  oral Datura (seeds)
BODY WEIGHT: 145 lb
This is how it is, you become schizophrenic. How? Well things manifest themselves that are not there in a state of perfect reality. I talked to my water heater for an hour because I heard my friend's voice coming from inside. He was stuck and trying to get out. It was 100% real, I at no point thought I was tripping. It was just reality. Then the 'What the hell am doing' sets in and the hallucination passes. Then you answer the phone and have a nice long conversation....Then you realize you're talking to a throw pillow and the 'What the hell am I doing' sets in again. Your buddy comes in to talk to you about what ever, 30 minutes later you ask him if he wants something to drink, then looking in the fridge you get this weird feeling...'What the hell am I doing?' you turn around and your 'friend' vanished. It sucks, you feel sick and out of control. Reality is the hallucination or is the hallucination reality??? What's real, you don't know. This goes on for hours and hours, I think on average about 14-18 hours.

There are no fractals or patterns or pretty colors (for me). There is no sense of 'WOW!' it's more like 'What have I done to my self'. Don't do it, I know if you are super curious you'll do it but you have been warned. This is the ultimate psychosis; the dangers involved with this are unbelievable. With the 100% conviction that the hallucinations were reality the dangers associated with hurting ones self or others are astronomical. You phase in and out of this state of altered reality with no noticeable transition. Running into traffic, setting the house on fire or even the stereotypical jumping out of a window are all very, very possible with this stuff.

If you are spiritual at all, understand that this plant is evil. There is nothing to be gained or learned from this plant aside from horror and self doubt. It laughs at you and is very malicious in its intent. There is no taming or set and setting for this. You can show it all the respect in the world and in the end it reaps your essence in the form of your sanity and your vision.

You will not see straight for days. I was uneducated when I first tried it and was convinced that I was permanently blinded by this plant. I could not read or focus in on anything for days. I agonized with this alone for days. I thanked god as every thing came back into focus. Just another effect of 'her' not wanting you to see reality as it is for as long as 'she' can. Another mind fuck.

Never again, if you really want to do it read the reports. You'll see that they are all pretty messed up.

I've done it 3 different times so it wasn't just a bad trip. I was an experienced 'psychonaught' and wanted to be sure about this plant and not give it a bad rap. All my friends agreed as well, this is better left alone or reserved for a hated enemy (at your own moral and legal risk).

You've been warned.

Exp Year: 1987ExpID: 25679
Gender: Not Specified 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jul 30, 2003Views: 15,769
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Datura (15) : Unknown Context (20), Post Trip Problems (8), Entities / Beings (37), Bad Trips (6), Difficult Experiences (5), Retrospective / Summary (11)

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