DOSE:

0.5 tablets

oral

MDMA

(pill / tablet)

BODY WEIGHT:

50 kg

I went to a rave party last Saturday with some friends and took ecstasy for the first time, and didn’t like it. I don’t know if this is a normal thing to happen, what it is due to, and I don’t know anything about pills so I just took whatever my friend put into my mouth.

I was expecting to feel high, to have a lot of energy, and to feel hot. What happened was the exact contrary, and I can’t explain it. We arrived at the party after 1 hour waiting for all our friends under the rain, so I was very cold and a bit tired. I thought the pill would wake me up and give me some more vitality.

At first it didn’t do anything, and then I started to feel so cold that I was shaking and I had to keep a coat, when everybody was dancing and sweating. My legs were really tensed and shaking, so was my whole body. I felt extremely low and lazy and I couldn’t really move, and I was moving my jaws compulsively. All my muscles were tensed and I thought that it was due to the cold. I felt really outside of everything (I don’t know if this is due to the pill or to my own mood), and I kept on chewing the same chewing gum for the whole night (my teeth and gums were painful the day after). I felt tired and low, so I didn’t feel like dancing, probably because I felt cold.

I also felt extremely guilty towards my friends because I felt like I was preventing them from enjoying themselves so I told them just to leave me alone and to forget about me, but they wouldn’t and they kept on putting water into my mouth (my mouth was extremely dry and sticky). I was persuaded that the pill prevented me from moving and dancing and my friends kept on saying that it was OK and that it was only in my mind and that I should just relax, but I couldn’t because I felt that it didn’t have the same effect on me as it had on others, and it scared me. My friends were really nice and trying to make me feel better, touching me and kissing me, or giving massages to my legs, but it just made me feel guilty that they should spend time with me rather than enjoying themselves, then I felt guilty that their efforts couldn’t make me feel better, and I ended up feeling guilty for being cold and for feeling guilty, which is a vicious circle (for the whole night!!).

I didn’t get high at all, but I went very low instead. I didn’t know that ecstasy could do that, I never heard of that before.

The day after I felt really tired and slept for the whole day, much more than I usually do after a night out, and was normal again when I woke up. My friends could still and were still dancing and moving, and hear the music on the way back home.

I really wonder if this kind of experience has happened to anybody else and if ecstasy can have that effect, or is it only me??

Exp Year: 2003	ExpID: 27911
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Oct 27, 2003	Views: 5,115
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MDMA (3) : Rave / Dance Event (18), Difficult Experiences (5), First Times (2)