DOSE:	repeated	smoked	Salvia divinorum	(extract - 5x)
	repeated	inhaled	Nitrous Oxide	(gas)
	3.5 g	oral	Mushrooms	(dried)
	40 mg		AMT

BODY WEIGHT:

190 lb

This journal shall hopefully be a guide for me into better understanding the effects of Salvia Divinorum. Like many journals I have attempted to write, they all end in lack of desire to finish them. I plan to make this journal different. It is my hope that I describe each experience in the fullest extent to better understand the unique nature of this plant.

9/19/2002

I received two grams of 5x extract. I was excited for my first experience and called over my friend to watch over me, since it was my first time and I did not know how I would react.

I prepared my water pipe and put a miniscule amount into the bowl, and lit it up. I inhaled and held the smoke, which wasn’t much. After exhaling, I did not feel much until about a minute, when I felt a mild buzz but not much else. I was disappointed but decided to try more. I put a equal amount of salvia in the bowl and lit up again. I did not feel anything much.

I decided that I was not doing enough, so about ten minutes later; I filled the bowl with a decent amount and lit it up. Upon exhaling, I did not feel anything right away, but then it hit me. I was amazed at this feeling and commented that I could not believe that this drug was legal.

All of a sudden, my body felt as if it were covered in ants. I was very itchy and sweaty and threw off my over-shirt and was about to take off my t-shirt when I said, “No, this is just the drug.” I pulled my shirt back down. I began to talk in a high-pitched voice, saying nonsensical things.

My perspective radically changed. I was standing at the edge of a cliff with my back to the precipice and beyond it was nothing. Nothing existed beyond the cliff. My universe shrunk till all it included was my field of vision in front of me. My universe was only 50 square feet, and that seemed fine. I was still in my room, but I did not recognize it as such. I was in a different place, not unpleasant but interesting/weird (for lack of a better word). I stayed in that universe till I came down.

My next conscious thought was that of me cleaning out my pipe in the sink in preparation for another trip. My friend brought a video camera to record this trip. I went back to my room and chilled for a few minutes and then refilled the pipe and lit up. After two inhales to clear the chamber, I did not have much perspective shifting, but mostly an extreme stoning effect similar to weed but noticeably different. I mentioned how I was amazed that my second exhale did not contain that much smoke. I also had a vague feeling that as I was talking, I was part of a children’s television show, explaining things to the viewers. I also mentioned the television feeling. I began to come down then, and I turned on my CD player and laid on my bed, attempting to have visuals, but to no avail.

I was feeling mildly disappointed, so I decided to inhale some nitrous. It gave me the typical nitrous rush, and I commented how I wished I could feel like this all the time, but neither drug intensified the other.

The effects wearing off, I thought about what I had experienced. It was a nice trip, but not quite a introspective and spiritual experience. However, I do feel that I started on a good level and plan to continue exploring consciousness with salvia.

9/21/2002

It has been two days since my first experience with salvia. I enjoyed my first experience immensely, but I found I was a tad disappointed that I did not experience any introspective or mind-altering states.

About 3:30pm, I load the bowl almost to the top with salvia. I clear the chamber and wait. I feel the familiar itch/sweat that I expect will be common to all my salvia experiences. It is not wholly unpleasant, but it is more comfortable without a shirt and A/C.

I felt the salvia begin to take hold. However, it is only a mild stoning effect and I decide that I must smoke another bowl as to achieve the desired effects. I loaded up the bowl with more and smoke it fully.

This is where my trip truly starts. When I finished exhaling, I stared at the windowsill and a feeling of déjà vu came over me. I couldn’t help but feel that I had done this (smoking salvia) for many years. I began to feel like I was experiencing a childhood all the way through to fatherhood in an incredibly short amount of time. I had conversations with my “best friend” as we grew up and played together. As we got older, we each had children of our own and reminisced about the old days and the fun we had and the fun our children were having now.

I then stopped and tried to fight the experience. I said out loud, “What are you doing?” and other things of the like, not fully understanding what I was experiencing. I then decided not to fight it and laid down on my bed and closed my eyes.

As I laid there with eyes closed, a multi-colored spiral/vortex began to swirl in my mind’s eye. It made one loop and started to form another loop underneath the previous one when I realized that this loop was alive and many intelligent organisms lived within it. The loop continued to move and I could hear the organisms talking.

A mother was explaining to her child how each loop represented the generation before them. I understood that I was witnessing new births and that I was the creator of all these beings. The mother kept explaining how old the generations before them were, but none were as old as the “ancient entity”. I was that entity. I was the creator, the vessel for these beings. The mother told her child that one day, she might take him to talk to the “ancient entity”, but that he might not talk back. As I listened to me being described as an “ancient entity”, I began to think of my own beginnings, when I played with my friend and my growing up. During the conversation about meeting the entity, the loop stopped spiraling and turned into a ribbon, resembling a sine wave, and continued to move in that fashion.

After a while, I began to get annoyed at these creatures, feeling that they had no right to be inside me and using me as a vessel for their own existence. I opened my eyes and grabbed at paper and pen, and with great difficulty wrote these words:

There is no father or grandmother
I am not the person
Leave me alone!
I am not a vessel
Stop creating things

After I wrote this, I laid back down and began to come off of the plateau. I laid there for a bit, attempting to absorb what I had just experienced, but I was still heavily under the influence.

I thought that this would be a perfect time for some nitrous, so I prepared a balloon and inhaled it. I did not think I inhaled enough, but then I peaked and felt as if a giant hand was bending me forward and turning me upside down. I straightened up and came off the nitrous, in a good, but exhausted mood. I wandered around my room for a bit and then called my friend, stating that I had an amazing trip, but was not yet ready to describe it.

I laid back down, almost completely devoid of any effects, and thought about what I had just experienced, and realized that I had my first, and amazing, introspective trip. I felt so special and so blown away. I dozed for about a half an hour and woke up and watched some TV. I got dinner and am now writing this. I feel great and the only word that comes to my mind is WOW. I have so much respect for this plant and am grateful for the insight that it has granted me.

9/24/2002

At 2:30, I load up and attempt to smoke but accidentally blow half the bowl out. I gathered up most of it, but I must be very careful from now on, since the salvia is such a light herb. I take two full hits.

Right after the first hit, I am aware of the effects and the itch/sweat starts. I strip off my shirt after the second exhale. The psychotropic effects begin.

I become aware that the waterpipe is alive. It is a person and it talks to me and says that I must put it on the ground. I comply and as I do this, I realize that my entertainment system plus several other random points in space have become alive as well. They start to make fun of me and comment on what a sloppy job I did at moving the pipe to the ground. They laugh at me and I wonder what has made them act this way. I talk back at them, telling them to shut up and mind their own business. It is at this point that I realize that the drug has hold of me.

I close my eyes and a wide brownish loop forms, with vague edges. It appears to sparkle with electricity, but the electricity itself is also brown. I see that the loop is actually made up of eight distinct pieces and that each piece represents each different entity living in my room (the ones that were laughing at me). All of a sudden the loop breaks towards the top at one of the junctions between two pieces. The loop becomes a snake-like thing and moves/loops away, out of my field of vision. It then comes back into my field of vision and rushes at me and goes inside my head.

The snake-like thing takes control of my brain and begins to tell me to do things. It specifically tells me to masturbate. I cannot help myself and I am aware that I quickly undo my pants and begin the deed. I kneel onto the ground, and after what seemed like an indefinitely long time, I felt a light tingling as I ejaculated into the trashcan. There was very little feeling involved and compared to other masturbation sessions, it was at the bottom of the scale.

I laid back down on the bed and listen to the music. I have Huey Lewis’ “It’s Alright” playing. As I listen, I am aware that I had picked out one of the voices within the song and was listening specifically to his part. The rest of the music was there, but I could hear every note of that particular part, which I am almost sure was the baritone. I then play “Piano Man” by Billy Joel and I notice that I have picked out the bass guitar part, and have just been listening to that.

As I come off the plateau, I sit up and realize that I have a paper due tomorrow and feel compelled to find the information regarding it. I begin searching through my notebooks and papers, finding myself unable to stop moving for five minutes. I am rapidly searching, but to no avail. I clean up all the notebooks and then check the computer and find the information.

The after-effects slowly tapering off, I wanted to clean my pipe, but my roommate was in the kitchen, so I watched TV until he was gone. I cleaned the pipe and begin typing this.

As I become more experienced with salvia and use this one drug repeatedly, I begin to find certain aspects that are similar to each trip. I get the itch/sweat seconds after smoking but it quickly dissipates. My perception of reality changes at the plateau. Each trip has yielded different perceptual changes, but that is to be expected and I hope that two trips will never be the same. I also realize that after the plateau, my memory is a bit fuzzy. I cannot recall very well what I did on the comedown. During the after-effects, I begin to understand what I have experienced.

Regarding the effects, I do not realize am I feeling them until a minute into the effect. It is almost as if two brains are working simultaneously. My conscious brain is having the trip while the unconscious brain realizes that something is happening a bit later.

Salvia leaves a sort of heaviness in my brain, kind of like after a huge test. I hypothesize that this is due to the fact that my brain did work hard, attempting to understand and comprehend the world around it while under the influence of this wonderful conscious-altering drug.

9/24/2002

This is not a report of a trip that I had, just my observations with others were on Salvia. J, D, and R were to partake of some this evening.

J went first and after a monster hit, started coughing and then it must have hit him because he started rubbing his tongue and then licking himself on the sleeve. I encouraged him to take the rest, so he did and remained in a weird state for about 15 minutes. As I was packing a new bowl, he threw an empty box of cigarette at me. It hit me in the head and he apologized profusely and with great sincerity, more than I have ever seen him do. He said he felt like he was more stoned than he ever was for about 5 minutes.

D took some and just sat there, eyes glancing around. He mentioned that it felt like J was a doll and J was talking to him, which apparently seemed very weird for a doll.

R smoked next and stood up with great difficulty and mentioned something about going out to the lake. He addressed us as grandma and grandpa. He also said, and J confirmed, that he felt leaden to the porch, like he couldn’t move.

That was the extent of their trips to the best of my knowledge because I did not discuss it with them in length, but I now know that people have similar reactions to salvia.

10/11/2002

I received 5 grams of 5x extract a week back, so I prepared and smoked a large bowl of my new batch of salvia (approximately two hits). I felt the familiar itch/sweat, but nothing much else. I was a tad disappointed that I did not feel much. At one point, I think I was mildly aware that my room was a penthouse at the top of an expensive apartment complex, but I cannot be sure. Mostly, I was attempting to force the effects to happen. I think I need to construct a larger, better bong so that I can take more salvia in. Perhaps this batch isn’t as potent as the last one. I will build a new bong and attempt to have a better trip this week.

10/31/2002

I had a great trip with my new bong. Also had S take a few hits and he had a good trip as well. This trip was hard to understand, but I will try to describe it. I was looking out the window and my frame of view contained the lake, horizon, lava lamp, my arm, and S in the chair. I did not recognize them at for what they were, but as one giant slate as if they were painted on it. I just stared at this canvas and it seemed like my arm was connected to the horizon and an invisible energy was flowing from it into the horizon. S moved and I became upset because it felt like the canvas was ripped, so I yelled for him to stop moving around. I slowly came back to reality and did not do much reflecting, but watched S take a good couple hits, which obviously sent him somewhere because he asked “Where’s my brother?” He thought he was back in his old house. He came back to baseline and we talked about our trips for fifteen minutes, reflecting on how pleasant the trip was and how weird of a drug Salvia is.

12/02/2002

K and I smoke one bowl together; a hit each. No real discernable effects on my part except a heaviness in my right hand that lasted for about 20 seconds. K just stared out the window for about half a minute. I think I am the only one who can take a hit of Salvia without coughing. Everyone who has smoked it, minus S, has coughed, and most of them are veteran weed smokers. I am sure the lack of effects was due to the extremely small amount I smoked and not the quality of the salvia. It is a few months old, and even though I keep it in a glass jar, I am not sure how long Salvinorin A stays active. When I have a good chunk of time to myself, I will do a massive salvia trip, but since finals are arriving, it will have to wait.

4/25/2003

It has been a while since I smoked any salvia. On this particular night, I am tripping on 3.5 grams of mushrooms and 40mg of AMT. I have done about 20 nitrous hits as well. I put Ein Deutsches Requiem on the stereo and take a nice fatty hit.

It hits me right away. The typical salvia mindshift occurs and once again am staring at a foreign horizon. My entertainment center has become a mountain range, shifting in color and growing in intensity. The music begins to take me to a place of unwant, so I attempt to change it. I find that I cannot recognize the CD remote and fumble with it for a bit before falling to the floor.

I begin to talk. At the time it made perfect sense to me, but after a minute of talking, I realized I was just saying gibberish. I shake my head and try to think of what I was saying but then a new phrase pops into my head: wagons. A fraction of a second later I add to words “Flowers for Cup,” so the phrase became Flowers for Cupwagons. What this means I have no idea. This is all I can remember form the salvia portion of the trip.

Perhaps the phrase was induced by a song (Vangelis’ Messages) I was listening to, and although no lyrics form the phrase, the rhythmic patterns of the song could have formed the words in my head.

As I type this entry almost four months later than the experience, that phrase has crossed through my mind many of times, for I feel it is a connection to my subconscious. I will discover the true meaning of this phrase and the link I share with it and salvia. Salvia Divinorum is the weirdest psychedelic I have tried to date, and I feel that there is still much to be learned.

7/20/2003

On a day off from camp, I sit on the deck with my brother smoking a bowl of nugs. We decide to smoke a small bowl of salvia each. He hits first and sits in silence as I inhale. The mindshift occurs and my own body becomes a mountain range shaped like an upright backwards “C”. With every word I speak, invisible energies shoot from the top of the “C” to the bottom, and I imagine what it would be like if I was listening to music, particularly Vangelis’ Messages (the song I feel that I share a transcendental connection with).

I turn to my brother and start talking. I am talking nonsense but the words make sense. “The Friday wagons are coming, B. You know they are…you know they are.” He laughs and mentions how fucked up he feels and that he doesn’t know what the hell is going on; internal as well as external.

The next day, I realize that the word “wagons” is somehow connected with salvia and myself. Friday and Flowers are just two beginnings for the phrase.

Typed on the same day as the previous entry. It feels a bit unfair to the journal and myself to be sharing these entries having months to think about the experiences. However, I share them in better understanding this strange phrase. More salvia is needed and perhaps a new prefix will surface for the wagons phrase. I must make sure that it truly surfaces and is not just forced into existence by my desire to discover.

I am starting a new journey this year. I have assimilated most of my experiences from the previous year and am ready to delve deeper into myself. I know who I am. Now I must go beyond knowing. I will discover what that is this year.

9/1/03 – 12/29/03

As I have gotten lazy, I did not record the salvia experiences this year after they occurred. However, numerous trips were taken and were quite similar since the dosage and source did not differ.

I smoked salvia about eight times. Each trip took place in my chair that although not aesthetically pleasing, serves its purpose well. They were fun but nothing spectacular. I learned that “flowers for cupwagons” means nothing and that alcohol and salvia do not mix. This semester sucked ass. I am tired. I am depressed.

Exp Year: 2004	ExpID: 31192
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jul 19, 2006	Views: 16,990
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Salvia divinorum (44) : Sex Discussion (14), Entities / Beings (37), Depression (15), Retrospective / Summary (11), Various (28)