DOSE:

oral

TMA-2

(capsule)

BODY WEIGHT:

62 kg

I was not expecting much. My boyfriend Z had acquired four TMA-2 capsules the previous year, and had tried a capsule out together with a mutual friend. His only comment afterwards was that the sunset had been particularly stunning, and I had not pressed for further details.

I found the remaining two capsules while cleaning up on a lazy Saturday evening, and we decided to try them. I didn't bother looking up information on them, expecting light, short-acting effects. We had already eaten a large, greasy dinner and it was nearly midnight.

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0:00 - We decide to watch a movie while waiting.

1:45 - While watching the movie, I notice colored specks at the edges of my field of vision. The movie is being projected onto a large screen, and at first I think I am seeing dust spots like those in a movie theater film. When I start paying more attention to them, they stop appearing. I'm not sure if I really see them.

2:00 - The movie ends and, apart from the colored specks, neither one of us notices any effects. I mentally file TMA-2 away as 'no effect', at least at this dose. Z seems slightly annoyed, and we are both feeling tired, so we decide to go to sleep after I put the projection screen away. The projector is still on and displaying the power status meter on the screen. When I look at the TV nearby, I see the same power status meter there as well. It only lasts for a split second, but it is undeniable. Unlike normal afterimages, this image is not in reverse color. I try to 'cast' the image onto the TV again, but it doesn't work.

Disappointed, I head off to bed. Closing my eyes, I see hundreds of variations of a church rose window, all intensely colored.

3:00 - I look across the darkened room at the bedroom door. It appears as a solid rectangle of greyness. As I watch, the vertical edges began to waver, and then smudge, as if a giant finger is rubbing across a charcoal drawing. I watch for several minutes, but nothing else happens, so I continue watching closed-eye patterns.

4:00 - Still unable to sleep, I try studying the door again. Amazingly, the grey door rectangle has been replaced by a set of marching red crabs. They are as pixelated as an old Atari game, and are crawling sideways in lock-step across the door. I am mesmerized. I have never seen anything other than ripply textures and enhanced colors when taking other substances, and unlike the image earlier in the evening, the marching crabs just kept going. I nervously nudge Z awake and tell him what is happening. He has some closed-eye visuals but they don't hold his interest for long and he falls asleep.

There is no insight to be had here. If I don't pay attention to what I am watching, I drift off into an unthinking state, only to return a few minutes later.

5:00 - The crabs continue to fascinate me until my blanket decides to join in the festivities. The light-colored blobs in the pattern form animated human shapes. A person repeatedly bending over and standing up. Two arm-wrestlers (the one on the right won). The arm-wrestlers pat each other on the shoulder and morph into a snow-covered castle. The castle melts into an oriental house with two seated tea-drinkers. They are headless, but continue pouring and drinking tea. I'm very entertained and wake Z up once more. He wants to know if the images are frightening. They aren't, but I feel they could be. He suggests playing a favorite CD to keep things calm, and I agree as long as I don't have to stand up to get it. I start to wonder what I have done to myself. The images are becoming more realistic and intense, and I realize I have no idea how long the effects will last.

While he is gone, I close my eyes. The rose window image is gone, replaced with an array of monkey faces. Baboon, rhesus, macaque. The layers of skin on their faces peel away while their eyes roll in agony, and the cycle repeats. Ordinarily I would be repulsed, but for many minutes I can't stop watching. The CD breaks the monkey face cycle, and I notice sounds in the familiar songs that I had not noticed before. Was I filtering it out before?

6:00 - The CD is over and I still don't want to move. Z patiently gets up and walks over to the CD changer, but on the way his body pops outward and explodes into millions of marble-sized pieces, which reform into a roughly human shape. He grins when I tell him, and walks around the room a bit so that I can see what happens. His legs remain a swirling mass, but his top half returns to a solid state. When he talks to me, one half of his face is pitch black and covered with neon blue symbols.

My stomach feels bloated and I am slightly nauseous. Z notes that my skin is very hot to the touch, but I am shivering from cold.

6:30 - I hold my hand up and examine it. It is no longer mine. I have a gecko hand. The fingers/toes twitch and move, but I'm not sure I've asked them to. While I am watching this, the colored specks from earlier in the evening return, and this time they continue for hours.

7:00 - My body is exhausted but I am not willing to go to sleep yet. I try to walk around, but my legs will not cooperate. I have to consciously take each step, bracing myself against the wall. Light filtering through the window brings on a bout of nausea, and in the light the edges of objects vibrate.

8:00 - The clothes on the floor begin to transform into objects. A hand repeatedly makes a fist, and it is so realistic looking that I jump. The hand begins talking to me in sign language, but I don't understand it. After several attempts, the hand disappears and reappears holding a steak knife. It isn't frightening, but I am disappointed that I am the source of such thoughts.

My left arm has been tingling for the past half hour with a pins-and-needles sensation. This suddenly goes away and is replaced by numbness, which lasts for another half hour.

11:00 - Finally, I've had enough and go to sleep.

------------------------------------------------

In the two weeks following this experience, I often saw images form in random backgrounds. Static displayed on the projection screen became skeletal hands, clouds formed into objects, and carpeting wiggled. After the first two weeks this occurred less and less frequently.

Exp Year: 2003	ExpID: 39877
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jan 18, 2005	Views: 17,562
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