DOSE:

repeated

MDMA

BODY WEIGHT:

150 lb

I feel that ecstasy is an often misunderstood drug. Though I am not a doctor, and can not offer any hard facts, I have been in the 'rave'/club scene for about 5 years, which is by no means a long time, but, I feel it is long enough for me to make a fair assessment of ecstasy's effect on people. There is no doubt that it can turn some people into complete idiots, social recluses and psychopaths, but this is true of many things, be it narcotic or otherwise. I know some people who have taken ecstasy for years, ingesting hundreds and even thousands of ecstasy pills in their lifetime.

In my experience, it is not the long-time ecstasy users who suffer the most damage from the drug, but the casual users who take it to have fun at clubs and parties. These people often don't understand the impact of the drug, and are not informed of ways to safely take it. They are also often more reckless, taking ecstasy multiple days in a row, often times 'rolling' for days on end. These are the people who I have seen, more than any other, become seriously messed up. They lose mental capacity, short-term memory, and develop various personality disorders. That being said, there is no doubt in my mind that ecstasy can be dangerous.

In my own use of ecstasy, as well as the responsible people who I associate with, we only take ecstasy once a month at the most. Usually, though, we'll wait for several months, often times simply because there is no good environment to take it in, or because we're plain broke. I take other precautions as well, such as getting a lot of vitamins, drinking milk, and making sure that I eat as I'm coming down. Eating can be quite difficult when I'm coming down, but I have found it to be indispensable in reducing the uncomfortable effects associated with an ecstasy 'hangover.'

Everyone is affected differently, though, and I believe part of my affinity for this drug is the fact that my ecstasy 'hangovers' are very mild. Usually, I first feel very calm as I'm coming down. This calm can be unsettling after the extreme euphoria of ecstasy, but is still very bearable. As I come down more, I suppose I forget about the euphoric 'peak' for a while, and just become very relaxed. Usually, after I roll, I have a much better outlook on life. I believe this is because of intense self-observation I experience during the ecstasy 'trip.' I am not the type to hold grudges, but when I am mad at someone, even for long periods of time, I forget about it after I have taken ecstasy (and came down). It is extremely liberating in the sense that I gain a tremendous sense of empathy and understanding for others, and I see their perspective, and compare it to my own, and match our likenesses and our dissimilarities. This kind of introspection creates wonderful relationships. I have taken ecstasy with most of my friends, and I consider it to be a strong support behind my relationships with some of my closest friends, as well as my girlfriend.

At a party where most of the people are under the effects of ecstasy, there is a common understanding of each other's mental state, which is a refreshing change from modern society where most people would be labeled as 'druggies' or 'crackheads' while under the effects of ecstasy. People become much more friendly, forget about social prejudices and personal vendettas, and just generally get along a heck of a lot better. I don't think I've ever seen anyone on ecstasy fight, usually any kind of conflict is avoided at all costs, as I think most people, at some level, want it. In most of my experiences, at least some of these epiphanies have transcended the actual effects of the ecstasy pill, and holds over into the consciousness of the people, enhancing their view of others and the world around them.

Of course, I also know a lot of people who have become very jaded and anti-social as a result of ecstasy use. These are mostly people who have taken far too much of it, in far too little time. I know several people who are very strange in person, reclusive and offensive, but when they take ecstasy again, they become more like normal human beings. I'm not sure if this is a mental dependancy on the drug to make them feel 'normal' or if it is a physical effect. Another possibility I have considered is that some people may regret connecting with people while under the effects of ecstasy, and when they come down, they're not sure how to react to people. Since, when under the effects of ecstasy, it is so natural to talk to people and even approach complete strangers, the social boundaries that exist in modern society seem to confuse them and they can't understand why they can't always be as social as they are while under the effects of ecstasy.

Exp Year: 2002	ExpID: 43428
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Sep 8, 2008	Views: 8,006
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MDMA (3) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Rave / Dance Event (18)