DOSE:

1.75 g

oral

Mushrooms

(plant material)

BODY WEIGHT:

95 lb

I just came down from the fucking most trippy emotional high of my life. And I don't know that it's something my body is capable of ever feeling again. Fuck man.

I admit I was apprehensive to eat mushrooms at all. I heard stories of people freaking out and well it freaked ME out. But it's something I've wanted to try and thought to myself, 'anything that you feel, remember that you did it to yourself, and it will only be temporary'. I went with that thought and proceeded to eat only one cap and a few stems (maybe 3 or 4) plain and just chase them with some water. I remember watching one episode of Family Guy, and then turning it off because we started to feel the body buzz.

So it was within a half hour that my legs started feeling light, weak, and tingly. It was real cool feeling, I knew I was about to start tripping. I remember it coming on really fast and I literally started, for no reason, cracking up, like laughter I've never felt before. I was crying because I was laughing so hard and there was absolutely NOTHING funny. Like, Family Guy was done and it made me laugh even more that there was nothing to laugh at. I felt great though. I was really happy feeling. I can't think of a better word to explain it except for trippy. And I guess that's for the authors who have done 'shrooms to define. I don't even know that I could, though I wish I could express the feeling. I couldn't stop smiling. Things started to make sense. Everything began to seem EXTREMELY trivial. I think it changed my life.

Really, the whole experience made me realize so many things about life in general. It gave me a whole new perspective. It just brought things out in me I never knew I had. I wanted to talk. I wanted to connect with someone. I wanted to know that someone was feeling what I was, because it was that amazing. I became so connected to Charlie, who I was with that night, that level of understanding could never come about in normal life, I don't care what anyone says. It was just a wonderful feeling.

I remember us playing with our hands a lot and just experiencing things as they came. Realizing how things are so trivial and how the world works just fuckin' sucks. Like, I remember wanting to rebel. I understood the hippie lifestyle. We waved our hands in front of our faces and it was tripped out. I could still watch my hand trail as it left. I could have done that forever. Experiencing things JUST as they were, not messing with ANYTHING just letting things BE. It was really powerful. Thinking about the end of this high made me sad, because I didn't want to come back to reality.

Any person you could have brought me around I would have made friends with. I wanted to have deep, deep conversations with everyone. I decided I wanted to be an artist. I wished I could capture how beautiful everything was to me and share it. I took pictures. I took a video of things just as they were. I remember being happier than I've ever been. How can coming down from that not make you sad? We had REALLY REALLY deep discussions and we just understood each other. We just knew what the other was thinking. I can't explain the level of understanding. I really don't think I'm capable.

I didn't want to get it on, I remember thinking that clearly because before I took them I was wondering if I'd get all horny. But the literal last thing that was on my mind was sex. It didn't sound appealing in the least. It actually seemed very insignificant and stupid. I wanted to laugh at sex because it seemed so stupid to me picturing people doing it. I kept thinking about the world and it's problems but I wasn't depressed.

I was literally in the middle of my high and I was loving it. Charlie understood EXACTLY my train of thoughts though and I remember being skeptical. Like, it seemed weird that that could happen; that two different people could be on the same wavelength like that. It amazed me and I thought it was beautiful. I didn't want to touch. I wanted to be just myself. I felt independent and I felt very very at peace. I felt like I had figured out what I finally wanted to do with my life. We took a picture of the ceiling with stick on stars and it seems so silly but we stared at it forever making designs out of it. I still thought all of this was so beautiful.

I remember wishing people could always be like that, and just LIVE. I was very in touch with my body and what I was feeling. I remember realizing that touch is one of the most powerful senses which is weird because I didn't want to be touched at all.
But I could go on forever about the feeling.

The come down was different. That was the only bad thing about the experience.
I got VERY depressed and cried a lot, thinking that the world is just such a shitty shitty place. I actually never want to feel like that again. It was a melancholy, sad feeling. The kind of feeling I would think someone would get before they kill themselves. I just knew if I was going to keep feeling that way, I did in fact want to die.

And don't get me wrong. I didn't WANT to kill myself and I was by NO means whatsoever planning suicide. But the world seemed very, just sad I guess to me. Hopeless. But I'm better now :)

The experience was most definetly A+++++ and worth every extreme emotion I felt (and I did feel EVERY emotion very strongly).

I'll probably eat some tomorrow.

Mushrooms, to me anyways, aren't a hard drug and in NO way should be classified with ecstasy or acid by any means. I didn't hallucinate but was afraid I would. I think it's worth everyone's time to give them a try at least. It might be a VERY powerful experience (as it was for me, I think it changed my entire life actually) but it might not be just the same.

I really have no advice I guess, that's just my experience and it was something I knew I wanted to share with other people.

Exp Year: 2005	ExpID: 44906
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Mar 26, 2007	Views: 20,934
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Mushrooms (39) : First Times (2), Sex Discussion (14), Depression (15), Glowing Experiences (4), Small Group (2-9) (17)