DOSE:	150 mg	oral	MDMA
	20 mg	smoked	5-MeO-DMT	(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

165 lb

I finally found it. I have been searching for 5-MeO-DMT for about five years, reading about it, asking about it, etc. It was my 'holy grail.' Finally, last weekend, I visited an old friend that I am very close with but haven't seen in years, and he was kind enough to let me try some.

The set and setting were perfect. My friend, my wife and I started the night by dosing approx 150mg of MDMA each. We had a lovely evening of free-flowing ideas and intense conversations about various aspects of the psychedelic experience. After the effects of the MDMA began to subside, my friend put on a CD called 'Alien Dreamtime.' This is a lecture by the GREAT Terence McKenna about DMT played over some intense ambient music.

We listened for a bit, and then my friend brought out a small vial of 5-MeO-DMT. He placed approx 20mg on top of a bowl of Kind Bud, explained axactly how to inhale the dose, turned up the CD, and I did it in 3 large hits.

Within 10 seconds, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was dying, the world was ending, and I was going to hell. It was utterly terrifying. I had no body, I was in the Void, but my inner dialogue was still intact. I kept thinking, 'Oh, no. Oh, NO! I've killed myself and now my karma is dragging me down to hell.' I had archetypal visions of hell and an angry God and me losing my life. The terror was so overwhelming I had to fight my way back to reality. I realized that I was not dead, but I was afraid of the drug. It felt like it was physically trying to grab me and drag me away violently, back to that place.

As I was desperately fighting it off, I began talking to my friend about the fear, and he calmed me. I felt this little bubble of negative energy moving around my body, so I concentrated it and sent it to my stomach, and began deep breathing. Finally I was able to let go of my ego. I was swept away again, but this time it was NIRVANA. I was in the light. I experienced the beauty of God, oneness with the universe, total enlightenment. My breath was the only connection with my physical body. My breath was the center of the universe. Time was nonexistent. I found it all. This is what Buddhist monks spend a lifetime searching for. This is what countless poets and artists have been trying to capture in their art. This is the goal of all religion. This is the meaning of life.

My inner dialogue was still intact, possibly because of the ego-increasing effect of MDMA, and all it said during the experience was 'Thank you, oh thank you.' When I finally came back to my body(approx 10 minutes after smoking), I was overcome with the sheer joy of being alive. I was nauseous, though. I sent all my negative energy to my stomach, so I guess it had to come out, along with the fish sandwich I unwisely ate earlier in the day. But it didn't seem to matter that I was throwing up a little bit, because I found the answers I had been searching for. I am so thankful for this experience. It erased all the sadness and negativity that had crept into my life recently. I am left only with gratitude, joy, peace, and love. Life is beautiful. Thank God for 5-MeO-DMT.

Exp Year: 2005	ExpID: 45442
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: May 14, 2007	Views: 11,921
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5-MeO-DMT (58) : Mystical Experiences (9), Small Group (2-9) (17)