Just about every job I've ever had required me passing a drug test.

My first employer was a big aircraft company in Long Beach, CA in 1988. Yes, that's a long time ago, but some things never change.

I was 19 or 20 years old at the time. The company gave me a full physical, and last was the drug test. The 'nurse' gave me a little bottle and told me to go into the bathroom, and not to flush the toilet or wash my hands until I gave her the bottle with my pee in it. I walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind me. In the sink and toilet was a thick blue dye. I guess that is to keep people from diluting their samples. I didn't think about it at the time, but the mirror was not over the sink, next to me but instead off to the side. If I turned my head to the left, I could watch myself pee into the bottle. Three years later, my roommate was seeing this woman that worked for the same employer I did. After a couple of glasses of wine one night, she told us she worked in the pre-employment screening area. Then proceeded to tell us about the two-way mirror in the bathroom where the staff would watch people piss into the bottles, and how they would make jokes about some guys and their 'small dicks.' Saying we were stunned just doesn't cover the feeling we had nor how we now felt about this person we at first liked, and enjoyed getting to know. My roommate showed her the door and never returned any of her calls.

I told as many people as I could for weeks after finding out. About six months later, I heard someone busted them, and was in the process of taking them to court. I hope their little peep-show was worth it.

Another time, with another employer. I think it was 1994 or 1995, I was offered a job with an up-start company. The money wasn't great, but I needed something until I found something better. I was told to show up at the end of the work day, and meet with my new supervisor and director of human resources in the lobby. I thought this was just going to be a little tour of the company. Boy, was I wrong. I get to the lobby and they are waiting for me. They tell me to sit down, tell me 'welcome aboard,' and how happy they are to have someone like me on their team. Then the human resource guy hands me a bunch of papers and asks me to fill them out. Most of the forms were nothing to get worked up about, like who to call in case of an accident, and a W-4 form. But the rest were for background checks, credit checks and a form you fill out before you take a drug test. They were talking with each other while I read each form. 'Talk about an ambush,' I said kind of loud. They look at each other and then looked at me. 'What seems to be the problem 'T'?' The HR guy asked.

I told them nowhere on the application did it say anything about background checks or a drug test. They said I was right, and that it should be known before the interview, and they would look into fixing that oversight. But for now, could I please fill the forms out and take the urine test? I told then no--especially for the tiny bit of money they were paying me. I also told them they could offer me twice the money and I still wouldn't let them invade my privacy. They shot back with, 'what are you trying to hide?' Give me a break! I then said, 'I will be willing to let you preform your background check and urine test if you share with me your background checks and urine tests...that is if the two of you took those tests.' They looked at each other, then started whispering in each others ear, look at me and said together, 'please leave.'
I got up, walked to the door behind me, and just before I opened it, I turned around and asked, 'what are you guys trying to hide?' Laughing as I walked out the door. That company went out belly-up two years later.

Exp Year: 1988	ExpID: 49897
Gender: Not Specified
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: May 18, 2006	Views: 18,499
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Drug Testing (59) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Not Applicable (38)