DOSE:

repeated

Cocaine

BODY WEIGHT:

180 lb

I am a mother and wife with a good family. I have been living a secret life for a year doing cocaine daily or weekly in binges. Using iv hits, inhaling, eating it,- how can my husband not see?

I have passed out and had seizures many times, each time saying this is the last time. Every time I come down I tell myself “no more” and I feel truth to my conviction at the moment. I find myself lured back by the cheap price, easy delivery and privacy of a distracted mate. I have found a weird peace in the crackling rail of disassociation with my physical body. It feels so good. I wonder if I am going over the edge, but do not care enough about myself to look forward to what might happen to my boys.
Not sure if it is the rush or the return but know after reading this site that there is no end except to abstain.

I am done. Returning to me is my new priority.

Exp Year: 2008-2009	ExpID: 80440
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: May 28, 2018	Views: 1,718
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Cocaine (13) : General (1), Health Problems (27), Addiction & Habituation (10), Families (41), Relationships (44), Unknown Context (20)