DOSE:

4 mg

IV

Hydromorphone

(pill / tablet)

BODY WEIGHT:

130 lb

To start off, I’d consider myself a rather well seasoned opiate user but have never had a sincere habit or addiction that lasted more than a month or two. I have used orally, intravenously, intramuscularly, subcutaneously and insufflated opiates such as oxycodone, hydrocodone, codeine, dihydrocodeine, morphine, methadone, propoxyphene, tramadol, as well as street and medical grade diacetylmorphine (heroin). This report is about dilaudid.

I first heard about dilaudid when I was around sixteen from reading William Burroughs. I also remembered it being mentioned in Drugstore Cowboy and that it gave a better rush than heroin when IV’d. I pretty much figured that an opiate that intense was rarely prescribed and that the chances of me ever getting a hold of any were slim to none; I was wrong. One night a friend of mine who was going through a bit of a methadone problem mentioned that he occasionally got 2mg dilaudid tablets from his neighbor for around $5 a pop. My jaw dropped and I immediately asked to be introduced to this guy.

We walked next door and we met the guy, whom we’ll call Evan. Evan was also a bit of a methadone addict as well but because he didn’t IV drugs, he didn’t really care much for dilaudid because of his high tolerance. Also, the amount of hydromorphone needed to get high is substantially more when taken orally or insufflated as opposed to taken intravenously. Evan agreed to get me the drugs the next day around 2pm, so the next day I was over at his house at 1:50pm on the dot as if I wanted to make a good impression at an interview. I gave him $25 for five 2mg tablets, a total of 10mgs in all. He got in his car, drove over to his dealer’s house, and came back twenty minutes later with a few very tiny white pills that had an “M” printed on one side and the number “2” printed on the other. After we exchanged numbers for future transactions I thanked him sincerely and drove off the local drug store where I was able to procure a ten pack of 1cc insulin syringes. After giving the pharmacist the money and the earnest smile of an opiate connoisseur who knows they’re about to get blitzed on deliciously rare pharmaceuticals, I was off to my house as quickly as possible.

When I got home I prepared the following household items needed to prepare my shot:

2 sterile alcohol swabs
1 teaspoon-sized metal spoon
Wax paper
1 lighter
My trusty hemp belt/tourniquet

(A normally important item that I chose not to use is cotton, as I have heard nasty stories from friends about cotton fever and choose not to filter with cotton when possible. I know that I am probably taking an even bigger risk by not filtering my drugs, however, with the dilaudid being medical grade I wasn’t very concerned about unknown solid particles. In general it’s always a good idea to filter street quality drugs. Cotton fever will not kill you, an embolism can.)

Before I commenced cooking the dilaudid on my nightstand, I put on a Broken Social Scene record to set the mood. I then placed two of the small pills in between the folded piece of wax paper and crushed them into a fine powder with my cell phone. Next, I opened up the packet of 1cc syringes and drew around 55 units of undistilled tap water into the barrel, then redistributed the water into the spoon. I then poured the powder into the water and watched it slowly dissolve. From what I’ve read online, applying heat was recommended to expedite the process and help separate the dilaudid from the filler, which apparently is not easily soluble in water. I slowly heated the liquid with a lighter and watched the remaining powder at the bottom of the spoon dissipate into a beautiful slightly milky and slightly viscous solution. There was a bit of powder still at the bottom which I can deduce was mostly the filler that the pills are cut with to keep them together.

I carefully dipped the needle into the solution, cautious not to let the tip of the needle touch the powdery sediment at the bottom, as it would likely cause the needle to clog. Ever so gently I drew up about 45 units of the heavenly liquid into the barrel of the syringe. I then prepped my arm with the alcohol swabs and tightened the belt around my upper arm, a few inches above that magic spot in the bend of the elbow.

It was the moment of truth. Not having IV’d drugs in over a year, I was a little nervous and clumsy because of my elevated pulse and general feeling of giddiness mixed with anticipation for this new chemical that I was welcoming onto my body.

I took a deep breath and smoothly inserted the needle into my vein as flat as possible, around a 30 degree angle. The 31 gauge needle was so fine I barely even felt the penetration. Once it was in I gently pulled back on the plunger and a small plume of dark crimson blood resembling a peacock feather mixed with the solution inside the syringe. I knew I had registered and I slowly pressed down the plunger until there was all but a unit of liquid left, which was mostly blood anyway. I pulled the needle out and released my breath.

There were about three or four tension-filled seconds before a tidal wave of warmth and comfort came rushing up my arm, up my spine, and finally filled my brain with euphoric opiate bliss, like and old friend. I gasped and fell back onto my soft bed and was overcome with indescribable elation, just looking up at the ceiling whilst wrapped up so gently in dilaudid’s buoyant embrace.

As the rush faded I was left in a fetal position and began to nod heavily, completely satisfied with my environment and everything around me. I don’t feel like “high” is the right word to describe the opiate buzz. I feel that “low” is a much better adjective. Whenever I’m in a heavy nod I feel like I’ve sunk below reality into a blanket of apathetic calmness and serenity, almost exactly how it’s portrayed in Ewan McGregor’s overdose scene in Trainspotting.

The effects persisted for the next five hours and I finally started coming down around 8pm, but was still extremely comfortably buzzed when I went to sleep around 11pm. I also enjoyed what I can only describe as alpha stage sleep with vivid dreamlike sequences similar to what I would imagine lucid dreaming would be like. I often experience these ‘opium dreams’ while going to sleep/nodding off after having taken opiates and it’s part of the experience that I’ve grown quite fond of.

Overall, dilaudid has become my favorite opiate to IV; even more so than heroin because it’s much safer to judge the amount to use and it’s not cut with all kinds of shit from the street. The rush is also equally, if not more, euphoric than smack.

I ended up doing the rest of the dilaudid that I had in the same manner over the course of the following week. It kind of scares me that I have such a steady source of these heavenly little tablets. I will probably do it again eventually but I know that I must be careful in spacing out my use as to not create a problem.
Recreationally, opiates are and always will be my favorite drugs in the whole world, but having lost friends to them and had problems with them in my past, I also respect the power they can wield on your life if you aren’t careful. The artificial joy they produce makes it hard to enjoy the non-material pleasures of life.

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 84522
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 19
Published: Nov 13, 2015	Views: 11,561
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Hydromorphone (300) : Retrospective / Summary (11), General (1), Alone (16)