DOSE:

insufflated

4-Methylmethcathinone

BODY WEIGHT:

175 lb

Now I know this may not be classified under the use of substances, but this has been something I've been wanting to do for quite a while now. The concept that one could hallucinate if he or she is sensory deprived is mind boggling. And although I was not in a flotation chamber or any other machine/invention of the sort, I feel that my lack of sleep for 40 hours, my lack of food or any nutrients for 24 hours, and since I insufflated mephedrone last night has made me hallucinate. Now I have to think that the whole reason I finally went ahead and sat in my heated bathtub for an hour is because of the thoughts I had on the mephedrone. At least the comedown. Actually it was all because of the comedown. That was my first time doing the drug and it was the first real hard comedown I've had. Not to say it's a difficult comedown, but for some reason it was for me. While in the tub though (Oh, let me add that I was in complete darkness, which you could understand by 'sensory deprivation', but I thought I'd clarify) at first I had slight visual hallucinations. Very very minute. They did increase a little though when I kept my eyes open for an extended period of time. Which this really amazed me. It seemed as if I had no reason to blink. My eyes were completely content with staying open.

Also I felt as if for a while I didn't need to breathe. Usually I breathe kind of, but not really, heavily; but it seemed as if I could hold my breathe for minutes. And even though I had no visual hallucinations, it felt as if I heard some things that weren't tangible. I do live in a dorm where noise is always prevalent, but it seemed as if the water was splashing lightly when I wasn't moving. And at one moment I thought someone had entered my room. But that went away shortly after. For some reason or another, although I didn't have the hallucinations of an acid trip, it seemed as if my mind was thinking similar to one. I think that with any trip, one should learn something about his or herself. And during this, I discovered my concept of love and my reasoning behind life:

- My concept of love (in the sense of a relationship) is that if you are truly 'in love' with someone, you want to be with them forever. But the true love is shown when your liking towards this person does not decrease. Now I know it is hard to put a value on how much one likes another, but think of it in the sense of any drug; or anything in that matter. If we are in contact with something for so long, our senses begin to adapt to that something and on a long enough timeline, we no longer feel the sensation we did at the beginning of the contact. And with drugs for instance, the more we do in a certain timeline, we grow a tolerance towards the drug, therefore needing more to get that initial feeling. So if one is able to keep that same feeling of like/love throughout all of life, no matter if they are in the presence of this person for the full extent of their life, I would have to say that is true love.

- My reasoning behind life is that life has no reason. Yes, we go through our day-to-day lives doing something because there is a reason behind out action, but I would have to say life as a whole has no reason. We are able to live however we choose to live. Some are more restricted than others (IE being born into a certain family/social structure) but there is no backdrop meaning towards life. And that is MY reason. You may have your reasons behind why you do the things that you do. And I am fine with that. I just know that I don't have a life ending goal. Yes, there are things I would love to do before I reach my end, but it's not like I'm searching for Utopia. I am free to roam this earth how I choose to, and that's what makes life so great.

This makes me truly happy deep down. LSD is my favorite substance by far. From the intense and beautiful visuals to the intellectual and far-fetched thoughts; the whole experience is surreal. And the fact that I am able to trip (even though not to the full extent of LSD) without needing anything except the chemicals in my brain truly astounds me.

Exp Year: 2010	ExpID: 88852
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Dec 22, 2010	Views: 3,869
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
Sleep Deprivation (140) : Hangover / Days After (46), Preparation / Recipes (30), Alone (16)